When The Fear Of Intimacy Destroys Your Relationships, What Do You Do?

Are you afraid to fully open up to your partner sexually, emotionally, mentally and spiritually? Does this create an insurmountable barrier between the two of you? Is this barrier manifesting itself as self sabotaging behaviors that push him/her away ad leaving you feeling frustrated, angry with yourself, stuck, confused and as if you are being controlled by some hidden force that wants to ruin your relationship life? If so then do you want to free yourself of it once and for all?What I have described is a fear of intimacy with another that often can have many deeper roots such as: The fear of rejection.
2. The fear of abandonment.
3. The fear of becoming too dependent.
4. The fear of getting emotionally hurt.
5. The fear of feeling vulnerable or exposed.
6. The fear of embarrassment.
7. The fear of feeling controlled.
8. The fear of becoming too passive.
9. The fear of repeating and re-experiencing the pain of a previous relationship failure.
10. The fear of re-experiencing the pain of one’s parental divorce.

And so on.

All of these fears are anchored in early experiences of emotional disappointment which are stored within you as negative memories. The memories generate these negative emotional states and they literally, like an invisible hand, sail you and your relationship on the rocks each and every time.

As long as they are there inside you you’ll always find yourself repeating, much to your disappointment, the same negative outcomes. Contrary to what many therapists may tell you that such experiences are meant to be learned from the very opposite is true.

You see in spite of the so-called lesson they “may” hold for you, the actual pain associated with them will remain within you and act like what I have called an “emotional mine” that will be triggered to go off whenever a similar current event triggers it. Such events occur ever day in your current relationship and the feeling of fear is the sign that the mine is about to go off.

So what do you find yourself doing when this happens? Well you either withdraw from the relationship in a conscious manner by making a conscious choice to do so or you find yourself sabotaging your way out.

In either case you are left feeling responsible, to blame, alone, inadequate, incapable of and afraid to have a fully intimate relationship.

The only way to free one’s self from such a scenario is to “deprogram” your subconscious mind of those early painful memories or emotional mines. The only way to do this, in my view, is to extract/erase them for good. This is now possible with a new process I developed over 10 years ago the name of which is mentioned in my bio below.

To learn more about reclaiming a healthy relationship life through the process of erasing negative memories or to request a complimentary coaching session kindly visit the web link below.

Provided by:http://www.selfgrowth.com